Numbers of Chaos

For this assignment, I wanted to delve into the topic of OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), attempting to replicate patterns of repetition in order to represent what compulsions are, what they look like, and how it can affect individuals effected by these repetitive behaviour(s), while also focusing on the negative factors that interfere with everyday activities; such as numbers and counting. I want to expand on a series I previously started following this subject; as OCD plays a large role in my life and has for the past couple of years due to past events, in which, I have been consumed by. OCD can represent and reflect different behavior’s some might not be aware of, focusing more of my layout on the subject of ‘fear’ which lead to my compulsions instead of the common association of OCD, what is cleaning and germaphobia. I decided to create a longer film than I initially planned, in order to reflect the time these compulsions take away from my everyday, as it takes me up to an hour to leave the house sometimes due to these behavior’s, and again the idea of constant ‘fear’ when completing these activities. The goal for this film was to create the feeling of uncomfort + fear, along with the idea of perfection to try and mirror as best I can, what OCD feels and looks like. I had a lot of fun with this assignment as the freedom given, created more opportunity to focus on something more personal which has also helped me understand more about the disorder alone through a lens I have not yet explored or knew of previously. The title of my Surveillance film is called “Numbers of Chaos” (a more personal reflection in order to represent the pattern of counting / numbers I follow when completing a compulsion; until it “feels right”) or in other words, until the fear has diminished.